Apr
2018
The most EMBARRASSING life
I woke up and there was the person in my dream looked like she was there but she wasn’t so I was talking when I was awake so that was a “great start” to my morning. Every time I was passing the stair case and there was a draft coming from up stairs it was scary when my mom came she didn’t feel it so she really thought I lied. When I got to school everyone was having so much fun I wanted to have fun but that character from my dream appeared again but that is what I thought. So when I started talking of course everyone was laughing at me so that was the worst thing that ever happened to me. So the rest of the day was basically the same so that was my day. It was the worst day of my life.I was not so happy after that day. Also the day after that went way better so that was the best thing that ever happened to me.
Elle Hallquist
April 24, 2018 at 5:32 pm (6 years ago)Hey Katelyn! I’m sorry you didn’t have the greatest day. I enjoyed reading your writing though. Here are some little things you could add/change to your post to make it a little more grammatically correct:
-Many of your sentences are run-ons (meaning they are too long in length to be understood), so just try to shorten the length of your sentences or add commas where appropriate.
-The first sentence somewhat doesn’t make sense. There should be an “and it” between ‘dream’ and ‘looked.’
-After many transition words, such as ‘so,’ or ‘also,’ see if you should add d a comma to make the sentence more understandable.
Overall, I loved your post. Keep up the good work. Have a good day!