A Detective is wandering down a dark, twisty alleyway, the darkness of the broken light posts and the shadows of the unfavorable folk lurking in the alleyway cast a sinister mood around him. They all give him judgmental stares, their looks conveying “you don’t belong here”. This puts the Detective in a defensive, stressed mode, his heart-rate increasing as he continues looking for this new lead. This Detective is chasing this lead on a case of his but he is struggling to catch them, because the lead keeps running away, the Detective’s eyes always catching the back of this head and the tailcoats that pop out from around corners. The Detective found from numerous sources that this lead is a tall, muscular man known for wearing designer clothes and scares anyone who looks at him with the gaze of a man with a purpose, a dangerous purpose.
The Detective is on this case and is tracking this lead because at his office a small girl asked for him to look into where her missing plush bear toy is. No one else was coming to his office anymore, not after the incident… But the Detective had all the time to help her, and how she looks so sad about her missing toy made the Detective take the case. The Detective did not know that this would lead to him going on a goose chase of tracking down 8 different people, and the 8th suspect is the head of the gang who steals children’s toys for his own son.
But as the Detective continues to turn around another corner, getting increasingly angered by the amount of turns and corners in this sector of the city. He begins to ponder “How can this guy know what steps I am going to take” and “how is this lead so fast?” as he continues to aggressively strut down the alleyway corridor. The Detective starts to wonder if all the eyes around he are somehow connected to how the lead is able to escape him. But as the Detective does one more sweep of the alleyway he sees the gang leader lead head down a corner that the Detective knows is a dead end, (but does not want to admit that he knows this from all the wrong turns he took trying to get this guy.)
The Detective chases down that alleyway his shoes getting soaked in the puddles of water scattered around the alley way, as he turns the corner the Detective shouts
“Hold it!
To be continued…
Alot of detail, good work
I really like the detail you put into describing the environment
Wow, I love your creative story, Sydney! It is very descriptive, and creates a vivid picture in the reader’s mind. I like how you concentrated on the main character of the story – “The Detective” – and used unique verbs and details that focus on the current scene.
I like the discription
I love the imagery like “tailcoats that pop out from around corners” and “puddles scattered around the alleyway”.
This is a very good writing. I’d certainly watch this music video.
I like the pace of your writing here…it moves the reader forward nicely. GOod use of the mystery of “the incident” …mmmmmm….??? Good way of developing curiosity.
Great cliffhanger ending.
20/20
Will there be any more dialogue in this story?
Maybe, thinking about it.