It’s a brand new week and i’m planning to do some creative things.

Dango Plushies

1. Draw more pictures. I want to try and continue my black and white style with my drawings. They always have a  nice look to them.

2. Create more models. I really want to experience more with PMD and MMD so I can start doing some things with models. It won’t be easy but I wont be big until I start up now.

3. Get felt to make a plushie. Since I’m moving soon, I wanted to make a plushie for me and my boyfriend. This will be the first time I make plushies so I should start trying it!

4. Plan out how my new room will be designed in Alabama. I want my new room to look nice. To do so, I need to do some decoration. With some decoration videos on youtube and my own creative ideas,  may just have the best room in the house!

5. Write more poems and type more in my story. I really need to get out of my laziness and start writing out my intelligent creativity again.

6. Come up with new projects. It’s time to get creative!

Made a second model of myself~ This weekend shall be a busy one… I’m gonna plan out more models to create and test them out in pictures… I’m so excited!

Aside from that, I’m really tired this morning… I wish I made coffee before I got on the bus ^^;

I don’t know if any of you know that “I Care” modeled poster around the Middle School last year but, I made it. The model however I had requested to be made for me, but I positioned and created that picture using MMD/MikuMikuDance.

Again, someone else made these models, I just positioned them.

Last night I found this program called PMD Editor where you can create your models using existing bases and models. So I watched some tutorials and finally made my very own model of my self~! I’m so proud… I’m going to make some more for sure….!

Me as a Dark Angel

Swirling and turning

I cannot see

Inside the pitch black-

Closing in on me

Stretching and pulling

The pain numb and fast

No longer a way to escape

The length of this cell is vast

Screaming and deceiving

I pull them in day and night

Yelling, lying at my friends

I give them such a fright

Why do I do this?

I swallow in the light

Now it’s trapped inside me

Forever out of sight

No wonder I feel so dark

I corrupted all that shines

Such a disaster I bring along

Turning red into bleeding black lines.

Around and around

Spinning a fast pace

Getting dizzier, lonelier

In a wide area of space

Run and stay away

Or you too will be pulled in

You will cry and you will die

Inside my heart of sin

I am a black hole

Eating its own self

And the only thing that I wish

Is to escape myself.

“Outcast”

You are not what they call an “Outcast”

You are only unique; different

That isn’t horrible-

Nor something to hide or to be ashamed of,

But to be rejoiced over.

Don’t hide your face with a paper bag and shun the world.

Don’t turn into a copy of someone else,

And do not be a shadow.

You are loved

You are cared

And you are special.

So be yourself.

For I am what everyone calls a “outcast” too.

And I found happiness in life by simply being myself.

Stay you.

Stay special.

Be happy.

And don’t ever change to fit in.

Because you do.

Along with the other outcasts of the world

Who will someday become the ones-

To change it.

Well today is Mii Day and I’m excited to get back into Aevidium Club. It’s supposed to be a depression, suicide, and self harm support group. Why I joined it? Because I know how it feels to be down in that way… I want to help others just like me… Hopefully I can make a change… I hope that this will help me to become a positive person 🙂

Most of you know me as Autumn Star Francis…

But I am way more than that with my friends.

I’m usually called “The Goddess of Imagination.”

Why?

Take a look at Esperellda.

Only a God can truly create their whole world and well…I made one inside my head…Out of pure imagination.

Others call me a “Dark Angel.”

I used to be innocent.

Never got in trouble or break rules…

But I changed that just to get what I desired…

Like an angel eating the forbidden fruit just to be with a demon they love…

They fall… they go dark…

Like me.

I don’t think Dark Angels are evil… just misunderstood.

That’s exactly who I am.

I am me… and I am what I represent.

It’s my identity…

What’s YOUR identity..?

Cross your fingers

You don’t swear

Hiding the motion

Behind your hair

You said you promised

You swore to me

All of you, traitors

Back to you, you’ll receive

“I promise you”

It should never be a lie

It takes a hello

And turns it to goodbye

But I have mercy

I’ll continue your fate

Break another promise

Sorry will be too late

I trust too much

I gave and I got back

Stepping down the hallway

My voice I start to lack

I break down and cry

Don’t you ever or never learn?

Getting this treatment

It’s always my turn

It hurts

It stings

It kills me inside.

Weeks pass

Months pass

And I finally died

Once I wake up I will promise me

To never break a promise or the promise will break me.

Wonder

I wonder how such things have happened.

Many events happened to me.

Some so cruel

Hundreds so vivid

Many filled with delight.

I’ll seek out my answers

I will try to fight

For I’m just a little butterfly in this world

Hoping to stay flying free.

Why?

Why do you come so unexpectedly?

I asked for some good

I prayed for no bad.

Still I got it oppositely.

How?

How do you travel?

Wings of black and white.

You gave me my worst.

You gave me my best.

You left my mind out of sight.

Where?

Where do you come from?

North, East, or West?

I look all around, avoiding sky and ground

Expecting the worst and best.

When?

When do you strike?

Is it only by random,

Or only when you spot turning wheels on a bike?

Who?

Who are you?

We know you,

You we love and hate.

You hold the strings, the wheel,

The butterfly and scissors.

And you are known as fate.

You’re never too young to go out and have fun! So take your shoes off and go jump in that bounce house!