The Forgotten Planet

A ship is approaching a strange planet. Most of it is land, colored blue, about a third of it is ocean, colored pink. It was classified as IEXOP-01. The climates varied, much like Earth. The ship landed in a flat, undeveloped area, there were purple vines draping from what looked like giant red corn stalks without the corn. It looked like a jungle, and it was very hot as well. The air pressure was 76% higher than Earth, so a pressure suit was required, or implosion would be definite. The air composition was 48% argon, 32% methane, 6% hydrogen, and 14% helium, so an oxygen helmet was necessary as well. The ship doors opened and a scout was sent out first to make sure it was safe. As soon as the scout set foot on the planet some blue tentacle, or maybe vine like things shot out of the ground and ripped him apart. Then a mouth opened in the ground and swallowed him. It shot a highly acidic liquid from small holes in its mouth which dissolved the victim, and the nutrients drained through a small throat hole. The rest of the crew grabbed their weapons and shot the monster until it turned orange and shriveled up.

Another scout was sent out and she scanned the area for any other life signs, none were present. She gave the crew the all clear signal and was then ambushed by creatures that looked like tall, slim, turquoise humans. They beat to death her with rocks, or at least what looked like rocks, and then let out a horrific shriek. Then a large winged creature swooped down and snatched one of them. The crew wasn’t going to let those, things, get the best of them, so they shot them too. Then another, smaller, one came out of the trees and scuttled over to the corpses. It had a slightly more feminine look. It rolled the bodies around, and seemed very distraught over their deaths. Captain Andrews reached out his hand to the being, but it bit him and ran away.

“Alright, fan out! I want everyone to split into pairs and survey the area. Contact the others if you run into any trouble,” Captain Andrews commanded.

“Yes sir!” the crew replied. The ship was relatively small. It could just fit the sixteen-person crew with enough room to spare for a storage area, bridge, mining station, and sickbay. Captain Andrews paired up with a botanist, Dr. Michael Jones. The crew also had two scouts, who both died, a zoologist, a geologist/cartographer, an archaeologist, a meteorologist, an astronomer, three medics, a therapist, a big-game hunter, a marine biologist, and an aerodynamicist. Everyone in the crew went through six months of rigorous combat training, and were well equipped to survive on the dangerous new planet.

Andrews and Jones were walking through the open jungle, very vigilant. A slight rustle in the flora sprung them into action, the trigger of the captain’s pistol was almost pulled the whole way. Suddenly, a quadrupedal, clawed, ravenous monster pounced on Jones. He held back its front legs as it tried to rip apart his face. Andrews started firing on it, but it had no effect, for it had an exoskeleton as strong as steel. The captain put his finger to his earpiece and cried, “Mayday! Mayday! This is Captain Andrews, we are under attack by a strange, malicious creature. We need reinforcements. Bring explosives!” Then, he tackled the beast and they rolled around on the ground. He pulled out a combat knife and stuck it in the monster’s mouth, stabbing its throat. It yelped and collapsed, but it got back up, stumbling as it walked. Dr. Jones jumped on it in attempts to keep it down so that it could be killed. He didn’t want this thing coming back after it healed. Brody Sangster, the big-game hunter arrived with his companion, Dr. Eileen Stewart, the marine biologist.

“We got ‘ere as fast as we could cap’n,” muttered Sangster. “I brought a C4.”

“Good, now give it here,” ordered Andrews. Sangster handed him the bomb and rested his hands on his knees, panting. He looked over at Dr. Stewart, who was standing normally.

“How are you not tired?” he asked.

“I went through three weeks of endurance training. Didn’t you?” she replied.

“Uh, well…”

Behind him, Andrews and Jones were struggling to get the explosive onto the beast. They were being tossed around, beaten, and clawed. Captain Andrews, bruised, bloodied, and sweating came over to Sangster and Stewart and told them, “There, the C4’s in place. Let’s get the heck outta here!” The four of them ran into the underbrush and hid behind a large rock. “Here goes nothing!” the captain stated. He then pressed the bright red button on the pen sized detonator. The C4 exploded with a huge bang, and debris flew everywhere. They turned around and looked at the smoke. The beast wasn’t dead. “This planet sucks,” complained Andrews. “We’re leaving. Now!”

The four ran away, avoiding the horrible beast, and Andrews contacted the others, telling them to rendezvous at the ship. When the remaining fourteen crew members got to the ship, they boarded, and started flying away. The door was closing as Dr. Jones was walking in, and then he was seized by the ankle by the wretched beast that ate the first scout. The crew tried to save him, but their attempts were futile. Dr. Jones was wrenched away and eaten by the monster, but the rest of the crew made it back to Earth safely. And IEXOP-01 was erased from all databases, and no one returned there for two centuries. But that crew wasn’t so lucky.


-Ashton Nafziger

4 thoughts on “The Forgotten Planet

  1. this was great— you created good tension throughout— spacing your deaths out appropriately . (ha )
    Also your use of detail was really convincing and gave this spectacular story realism.



  2. Wow, I love how descriptive your story is! When I read it, it felt like I was actually on the planet! There are many vivid verbs used, and I like how you named each of the characters uniquely. The dialogue is also a great touch to your story!

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